I recently attended a body confidence photoshoot. Photos were tastefully taken, in underwear celebrating the woman you are.
Whilst I do believe these shoots are important for some women, it is worth the cost if it means this works for you. I am writing about it here because I didn’t fully buy into the experience and more importantly, the high cost of it.
Unfortunately, I was dubious about the process and the level of time and effort required to complete the tick boxes of what were clearly selling techniques. That said, I did benefit from showing myself I could do it and I loved the experience on the day. Aside from the sales team, who contacted me before and after my experience, I had a great time.
Women wearing make-up, dressing up, and generally feeling good about themselves, is a hot topic. And I think it’s important to discuss my point of view.
Before children, getting ready for a night out didn’t mean much. It was just something I did. When you’re sleep-deprived, sick of cleaning up the mess or taking a toddler on every toilet break you have, getting dressed up feels fantastic. I would say it is now my only way to mentally get away from mum-life. To step outside my usual mum-bun, washed-out look and prioritise myself for a change.
I think I spend more money now on self-care than I ever did before. Unfortunately, age is not on my side and sleep deprivation requires some pretty fantastic products to make you look human.
After pictures
Mum-life pictures
How to restore body confidence
Concentrate on what you love about yourself
It’s taken me years to feel this way, but I finally like some parts of myself. When you go through childbirth, you have a different perspective on body privacy and you care a lot less about image. I spent the whole hospital stay completely naked because if I even had a thin sheet on me, I was sick. Several hospital staff saw this throughout the hours we were there. Frankly, I didn’t care. My body was performing, other, much more important duties. I will be honest though and say, I don’t think I would have attended a photoshoot like this, before having children.
Think about the parts of you that are amazing and if you can’t think of any, ask someone you love. Get a different perspective. ly throw yourself into a photo shoot, as I did!
The scales mean nothing
If you follow any of my blogs, you will see I steer away from food images or discussions about weight. I ditched the scales years ago. And I have been all different sizes. I mean, there is a common sense approach to eating well and doing exercise. I do not buy into diet culture. Anytime I have ever exercised in the past, it was for mental health reasons.
Following a strict regime, can help some people. But if this is impacting you mentally, stop being so hard on yourself.
View self-worth as much more than your image
I would much rather have an intelligent conversation with someone, than care about their appearance. But I didn’t always feel this way. When you’re younger, there is pressure to look a certain way. I still hear people talk about couples who don’t match because one is better looking. I mean, it’s petty and irrelevant.
‘Worth’ to me means intelligence, kindness, someone you can chat with, someone who lights up your life, who has good intentions behind their eyes. There is so much more going on with every person you encounter, than just the image you see in the first few seconds. Get to know the more important traits of that individual.
Take a social media break
I have a love-hate relationship with social media. In the past, I deleted all my personal social media profiles. It was too much for my mental health. I do love the blogging community. But even now, social media can become overwhelming and I have to take regular breaks.
If you need to do this, add a post letting people know what you are doing and set boundaries. Social media will still be there whenever you decide to return.
Treat yourself how you would treat someone else
Ever found yourself in a changing room with a friend? Maybe you had to break some bad news gently. That dress just didn’t suit the person’s frame. It wasn’t the right colour. Sometimes you need this honesty from a friend. But I am sure you gave the feedback in a way that was warm and comforting.
Treat yourself this way. Talk to yourself as you would someone else. Take your own advice. I have suffered the catastrophic effects of being too harsh on myself. Talking to myself with kindness was the best thing I ever did.
Focus on the positives of our physical body
I have recently written on this blog about my spiritual self. But we must also give thanks to our physical body. I mean mine carried around a tiny human for nine months and gave birth to this wonderful miracle. It’s got me through two 10k races and many other challenges in life.
Start honoring all the amazing things our bodies can do and focus on this, instead of the negative.
Dance, sing, move
Pre-children, I heard people say this, and I purchased the motivational signs for the house. However, since having a child, this is daily life for us. We dance in the kitchen, our little one has just started singing nursery rhymes and making a song up for everything she does. When you participate in this, you can’t help but be happy. And we are talking about pure happiness. A moment of joy. And it really does brighten up my day.
Get in tune with your body and use it for joy. As many times a day as you can fit in.
Buy clothes to show off your style and figure
Make sure your clothing purchases suit you and compliment your size and shape. That said, don’t be afraid to step outside your comfort very now and then.
And please, don’t stress about clothing sizes. Every shop I go to has varying sizes but labels claiming to be the same clothes size. I am even finding this with toddler sizes! We cannot beat the clothing size game, so discount it from your mind as something completely irrelevant. Because it is.
Summary
I hope you enjoyed reading this post and that I have motivated you to talk more positively to yourself, or simply give yourself a break.
Let me know your thoughts in the comments below.
Interesting topics and I agree with you. It takes a lot of time to achieve it. But I’m proud of you for being a strong woman. Thank you for sharing!
Fransic verso recently posted…Tips to improve your productivity working from home
What a hugely positive blog post, it is so empowering how you have not only improved your confidence but sharing your experience to help others. Thank you for sharing.
Lauren.
Lauren recently posted…Ingratitude Journaling: How Negativity Can Improve Your Mental Health Development
This is a great article, very relatable and motivating. Thank you for sharing your experience.
Christina Trama recently posted…Cancun, our first international adventure!
Thank you – glad you found it motivating.
What a wonderful post! I absolutely love the after photos with makeup and your hair done! You look absolutely gorgeous and it’s so important to do these types of things. I have done professional photos and I have to say I felt really amazing with a good photographer. It’s nice to celebrate yourself and have the right person make you look and feel amazing sometimes we need a nice reminder. 🙂 thank you for sharing!
Thank you for the lovely comments. It was nice to get dressed up and be myself again.
I love all the pointers you gave , for me I grew up being teased for being too small. People will always ask, can’t you gain some weight etc. I usto always feel bad knowing that I am under weight for health reasons and I can’t do anything about that but now i am learning to love me more day by day.
I am sorry you went through this. People need to think before they make comments, but they don’t. We never know the struggle someone is facing. Glad you are learning to love yourself more.
Very motivating! Thanks for sharing, it takes a lot of strength to share things like this!
Christina Trama recently posted…Ways to save, part 2
Thank you. I am all about honesty across my three blogs. I must admit, sometimes I am nervous about sharing these topics. But I must keep doing it if people can relate.
[…] My photoshoot and how it restored a level of confidence […]
[…] about sharing these topics. But I must keep doing it if people can relate. And judging by the comments on this blog and my other ones, people can relate and enjoy reading. I also enjoy writing. Expect […]
[…] incredibly thankful for it, because, honestly with this long list of cleaning tasks, work, mum duties and blogging, I really couldn’t face washing up. When we move house, a dishwasher will […]
Wow… this is the first time I heard of body confidence photoshoot. It’s sounds awesome. I would like to try it.
Fadima Mooneira recently posted…FADIMA MOONEIRA ART GALLERY NOVEMBER 2022
This was such an encouraging post to read. I feel good about my body (while I work on finding the healthiest version of myself physically and emotionally) but I also find that I am not currently fully embracing that (yet). This was a great read and reminder to be kind to ourselves as we find this part of us!
Molly | Transatlantic Notes recently posted…Innovative Travel and Transportation Climate Action
These are all great tips for being more positive about ones self. Well done for doing the body confidence photoshoot. I don’t think I could do something like that
I didn’t think I could. But I just went for it.
[…] see runners and think about how they do it. However, whilst I was in the midst of my running days, confidence wasn’t an issue. I had the drive and motivation to get out there and help myself mentally. […]
Firstly, you are gorgeous in both before and after photos. Second, it is truly difficult to look at ourselves in the mirror on any given day and see beauty. It’s honestly highly difficult to see anything other than a “hot mess”. But, we are here and we are beautiful and strong. Thank you for sharing!
Thank you so much. And I love this motto for life. Even on the days we are just not feeling it!
It’s nice that you dance in the kitchen because it’s a good thing to do. And glad you gained confidence which is important.
Fransic verso recently posted…3 harsh facts long-distance relationships and more important tips
It’s refreshing to have some level of confidence now. I had none before!
[…] any of my TikTok videos, you will see that confidence comes naturally. I suffered from a lack of confidence for most of my life. But after some tough, life struggles and now coming up to almost 40. I simply […]